Confession … I have been writing this article for 3 weeks and thinking about it for several before I even put words on paper (um … screen).
My days seems to be in perpetual shuffle mode.
Today, for instance … rain began at my son’s tennis sectional match. Shuffle. We are currently waiting in Panera for 2+ hours to finish the match indoors.
Earlier today, my daughter sent a video of her talking in baby voice to my “grand” dog, “Ready to go see grandma today?”
I punch speed dial: “You are coming TODAY? I thought you said tomorrow.” Shuffle. Sheets changed and breakfast casserole defrosting a day earlier than planned.
I often press shuffle on my music app. I like not knowing what song is next.
Side note: I like all the songs on my phone — I picked them! Shuffling music is a safe surprise, and I can always skip if I’m not feeling it.
But honestly in day to day living, shuffles can be more annoying than amusing, unless someone ahead of me pays it backward for my coffee, or I get to see my kids for an extra day. I like those shuffles.
This past month, the shuffles squeezed my heart kind of hard, taxed my sleep, rearranged my calendar, and drained my phone battery while I made back up plans to Plan H.
But God — I just love those two words — is faithful, patient and forgiving as I am still in process and continually learning to trust His hand and heart.
How deep does my faith need to go? Evidently, only deeper till I don’t need it anymore when I get to heaven and see Him face to face.
More dialogue, honest talking with God is happening in my heart. I am excited to share more on that in the near future. Unless, of course, God presses shuffle again.